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If you have a cold sore and you give your partner oral sex, you can infect them with the herpes virus. Even shallow insertion of the penis into the vagina (sometimes called dipping) carries risks for both partners. Jordi Lippe-McGraw is a freelance writer and editor covering travel, parenting, and wellness. She’s traveled to more than 50 countries on all seven continents (including Antarctica while five months pregnant) and equally loves penguins and truffles.

Roughly 1 in 3 adults 40-plus say they’ve used a vibrator for solo and partnered sex, according to AARP’s Ageless Desire study. You might be ready to try sex toys to spice up your 50-plus sex play, but where to shop for them can be daunting. An actual store where you can talk to a salesperson and browse might be appealing unless you are afraid of, yikes, is that my neighbor?!

This was not the case with the less expensive Satisfyer Purple Pleasure. The Beso Plus was our least favorite of the clitoral suction/G-spot dual-stimulator vibrators we’ve tried. Our tester found the “mouth” of the toy to be uncomfortably firm and irritating. If you wish to use a lubricant with your toy (as experts often recommend), keep in mind that only water-based lube is safe to use with all types of toys. Oil-based lubricants are not just unsafe for use with condoms but can also interact badly with toys made of soft plastic or rubber, causing the devices to disintegrate or to leach chemicals (PDF).

Get intimate from afar with these app-controlled vibrators, suction toys, rings and more. You can read more about how we enlisted actual long-distance couples to test and review sex toys at the end of the guide. Rabbit vibrators are extremely popular in the sex toy space, and for good reason. With two arms, they provide both external and internal stimulation. When you buy a vibrator, it’s essential to know how to keep it clean.

And boy oh boy are there a lot of different types of external vibes. “Whether you’re thrusting into someone else, into your own hand, or just wearing it around, you don’t want the dildo to be wiggling around,” she explains. A prostate massager is a vibrating toy that goes up the anus to stimulate the prostate. “This can be thought of as the male equivalent to G-spot stimulators,” Fleming says.